A Fostering Journey


Fostering has brought my husband and me on this amazing journey over the last eight months and it’s been both incredibly easy and incredibly hard. 


How can that be? 


A child born to another woman calls me mommy. THe magniture of that tragedy and the depth of that privilege are not lost on me. - Jody LanderI’m not quite sure. Sometimes it feels like the babies are just an extension of me and if they bleed I bleed. Other times it feels like I have two little strangers in my home. One of the hardest things to do is to not judge birth parents. At times I have an anger so fierce for what these babies have gone through. How dare you say you love them when your choices affected them like this! Then other times, I am just so filled with grief over the fact the birth parents missed so many amazing milestones already. 


And honestly, I wish I could say I am more sympathetic and empathetic than I am angry and judgmental. But it’s not true. 


I am learning this is the struggle of foster care. It’s messy, and beautiful, and heartbreaking. But I would do this all in a second again.


I am so blessed to have the mommy role in their lives for now. And today, that’s what I focus on. Maybe I’ll get that privilege forever and maybe I won’t. I don’t know. What I do know is that today I am momma because that is what they need.


Bianca Richardson is both a foster parent and a Therapeutic Foster Care Consultant at Boys and Girls Homes of North Carolina.

Learn more about Foster Care at B&GH.

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